Ok, I was going to write about how difficult it is to take the next step and write a second post, then I was going to write about our trip to Seneca Lake this weekend, and maybe I’ll do both later on, but I’ve been hit with something this morning and I want to write about that.
But first a bit of background:
Over the weekend my husband and I celebrated our 10th wedding anniversary (Yay us!, story of the trip for another time). Unfortunately I woke up with a sore throat and congestion the morning of the trip. We made it anyway and had fun, but now I’m home nursing a cup of tea and feeling miserable. Here’s the important part. The tea I’m drinking (Traditional Medicinals Gyspy Cold Care, for anyone who’s interested) has inspirational little sayings on the teabag tabs. The one on my tea bag this morning said this:
“The difference between a flower and a weed is a judgement.” – unknown
And this just kinda floored me. I mean, we’ve all heard this before, usually as “One man’s trash is another man’s treasure.” But this seemed more personal; less about stuff and more about me. And I got to thinking, “Am I flower or a weed? And who gets to decide?”
And the answer, of course, is: ME. I get to decide if I’m a flower or a weed. Even if everyone around me calls me a weed or treats me like a weed, I’m still a flower if I say so. If I believe so. And that’s the important bit – I have to BELIEVE it. I have to believe in myself. And that’s hard to do sometimes. Sometime it feels like the whole world is telling me I’m a weed, that I’m stuck where I am and will never be anything more. Those times it’s easy to slip into weed mentality, to just say, “It is what it is,” and stop trying. Unfortunately I think I’ve been living my life this way for a long time. But I want to be a flower and I now know I have to fight for that.
So, step one to being a flower: You have to believe you’re a flower. If you don’t, no one else will.
Step two: if you’re planted among weeds, or people who call you a weed, plant yourself somewhere else. We’ve all heard about toxic personalities: people who bring other people down, or suck the life out of you. Sometimes they’re unavoidable, but limit your contact with them as much as possible because it’s really hard to believe you’re a flower when all you can see are weeds.
Step three: show your petals. Don’t be a flower alone, spread the love. Be a person who complements others, who lifts them up and brightens their day. Don’t judge – that just creates more weeds.
In other words, act like a flower. That’s the easiest way to feel like a flower. I guess it’s hand in hand with the “fake it til you make it” mentality. And hopefully, as you’re showing your petals off, others around you will catch your spirit and rise up to be flowers, too.
Hope this helps on a Monday morning. This flower is going to finish her tea and get some rest, then who knows what I’ll be able to do?